6 Weeks is a very long time
And so our overseas trip has finally been announced. To Pig Sea, Hong Kong and Macau. At first I was really reluctant, wasn't even aware of the trip in the first place! And then we were told that we will be taking 2 modules from the next sem during this trip, so if we pass, we're exempted!! OMG I was so freaking tempted by that. And also, since Ahloy is working during that time, its not like I would be seeing him much even during my super long vacation. So anyway, I guess it will be a very good experience for me, like learning to be independent and all, plus being apart from him will probably make me feel more liverated and matured. So I guess I'll be going! For 6 long weeks!
Gosh. This is quite mind-boggling. And the parents have OK-ed it as well. But last night, there was a sudden bought of uncertainess, before I fell asleep as usual. The darkest time of my days. I was thinking naybe its a wrong choice for me to go, what if I fell sick? What if I didn't prove capable of taking care of myself? I can't just hop on a plane and come home, its not possible. Its a very long committment to make, and last night, I just didn't have the confidence in myself.
What if something happened to me? Am i making the right choice? What if I miss him so badly? Will I be able to take it? Which brings me back to another point. Everytime I talk to him about something serious (not joking around etc.) I am not 100% sure that he's taking me seriously, or if he is even honest with me about his feelings and reactions. I can see so many things passing through his mind, but he just says 'ok'. I wonder when will I know what exactly is he thinking.
12:50 AM
